How to Make the Most Out of Online Therapy
Since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, online or virtual therapy has become much more common—and it’s here to stay!
There are pros and cons to online therapy, but it can be a great fit for folks who have limited time in their day, accessibility challenges getting to a physical office, or for those living in a remote community looking for someone with highly specialized skills. This post will outline ways to make sure you get the most out of your online therapy experience.
Not all therapists are skilled or comfortable with online therapy. Some folks have been practicing in person for a long time, and an online platform may interfere with some of the habits they have around doing therapy.
About Your Therapist
To ensure you get the most from your therapy experience, here are some great questions to ask your virtual therapist:
Why do you like working online?
Some therapists will actively tell you that they don’t! In which case, I can understand why they are not feeling their best. For me, working online gives me freedom, more time, and greater space in my life. As someone who has had to commute for the majority of their career until now, I’ve found the stress relief from not needing to account for travel time to be invaluable. This allows me to enter sessions feeling more relaxed and grounded, which helps me be more present.
How comfortable are you working online? Have you received training to make sure that your work is effective?
This question will let you know how intentional a therapist has been about adapting their skills to an online environment. Personally, I have only ever received training, supervision, consultation, and experiential practice in online settings, so this is my comfort zone. I have also been on the receiving end of incredibly effective online therapy as a patient. I know it works on both sides, and am confident in the research I have done and the skills I have learned to be effective.
About You
To get the most from your experience, it is just as important to prepare for entering and leaving a virtual therapy session as it is for an in-person appointment. Here are some practical tips to follow:
1) Schedule your session at a time when you won’t be interrupted. If you share your home with family or friends, make sure that they know you are not available and set up your therapy space in a private area where you won’t be overheard.
2) Your therapy time is important, and the way you hold intention towards it will impact how effective it can be. Set aside a few minutes before and after to allow for some transition time. Give your body a chance to relax after a session—this might mean taking a short walk around the block, shifting to a different space in your home, eating or drinking to help with regulation, or doing a quick dance to shake out the jitters. A good online therapist will support you in building a routine around your sessions to make them as effective as possible.
3) Turn off your notifications. This time is for you. Put your cell phone away, and make sure that the notifications on your laptop or tablet are silenced, in the same way you would if you were in person. Distractions can really get in the way of making the most of your time.
4) Use the best device. A laptop or stationary tablet works best for virtual therapy, as it allows for a stable camera angle for your therapist to see you, and for you to be able to connect with them at eye level. If you don’t have a strong wi-fi connection, you can try tethering from your phone, or turn off other devices in your home that use wi-fi for the duration of your session. This can make a big difference to the video quality. If wi-fi continues to be a problem, then use an ethernet cable to ensure smooth internet access.
5) Ensure good lighting. If you are backlit (sitting in front of a window, or bright light), your therapist won’t be able to see you. So much of what happens in therapy is about observing the emotion flashing across your face, that might be happening without you even consciously being aware of it. Therapy activates mirror neurons (right brain to right brain connection) where your therapist is actually experiencing emotions with you, and for that to happen well they need to be able to see you.
7) Create a cozy space. Sometimes, we don’t have the option to sit somewhere other than our work desk. But if you do, try to separate your therapy space from your workspace. It signals to your brain that you are doing a different kind of activity. Some folks like to sit on their bed or a couch, so they feel cozy and comfortable during the session. This is one of the best perks of doing therapy from home! You can do whatever you need to feel safer. For some folks this looks like having their pets with them in session. Some people wear sweats or pj’s, or get cozy with a blanket and slippers. Even things like scent can be important. I have heard of one person who has a special therapy candle they light during a session with a scent they find calming.
6) Bring whatever you will need to your session. This can include things like tissues, water, a mug of tea, a notebook or journal. I have many clients who write down key points from our sessions to reflect on later or bring journal entries about what has been coming up in their life that they hope to discuss. This can increase the likelihood the new insights that come up in therapy will stick and transfer into your everyday life.
8) Expect tech glitches. If you do encounter an issue, most likely your therapist will have a plan, so don’t panic. Just send them a quick email to let them know what is going on for you so that together you can figure out the best plan moving forward.
All of these tips can help you create more intention and space around your session, increasing the likelihood of a deep and meaningful experience.
Online therapy is here to stay, so we might as well get good at it! My hope is that as more counsellors begin to work in this way, some of the barriers that make accessing therapy challenging will be reduced, and people will feel free to do what they need to in order to have a more grounded present therapy session. Overall, this will help therapy be more effective.
At The Commons Wellness Collective, we work with a wide variety of availability and in a broad range of areas of practice. We are honoured to be able to offer folks support seven days a week at a range of times, including morning and evenings. If you’re curious about whether online therapy might suit you, please reach out. We would love to connect with you, and offer a free consultation to give you a chance to meet your counsellor, suss out the vibe, and ask any questions you might have.