Navigating the Discrepancy in Health Care Faced by Women
It is impossible to describe accurately the frustration one can experience when feeling unwell, yet constantly being told that test results are normal, or inconclusive. You feel like you’re not being taken seriously when trying to access medical care. This is the experience of many women who find themselves seeking answers when dealing with unexplained fatigue, pain, digestive issues, and more. In 2025, the World Health Organization described Endometriosis, a disease with as of yet unknown origins that is estimated to impact up to 10% of women, as an immune system dysregulation that can take between 4 and 12 years to diagnose. There is now a hypothesis that this means that endometriosis can impact every system of the body, causing inflammatory responses and chronic pain. As of yet, there is no known cause or cure. This is one of many examples of a disease that has a significant effect on a large portion of the population, yet minimal progress has been made in the last four decades, since my mother was diagnosed with the same illness. The years leading up to getting diagnosed with endometriosis, or any disease that predominantly impacts women, can take a toll on one’s mental health. It is disorienting to be told your pain levels are normal, or that nothing is wrong, when intuitively you know what you’re experiencing is not ok.
I recently found a new internal medicine specialist who told me doctors are uncomfortable with not knowing the answer, and feel better being able to run a diagnostic test or prescribe a medication to fix a problem rather than admit that our medical system has failed when it comes to women’s health. The relief I felt hearing this said out loud from someone in that system was profound. It is easy to feel helpless trying to advocate for yourself when you feel stonewalled every time you go to the doctor’s office. Not only that, all of the remedies folks pedal online as surefire ways to alleviate your symptoms come with significant price tags.
When you are in a space where you are navigating the healthcare system out of necessity, to try and get answers to support yourself and improve your quality of life, you can feel alone and like you are fighting a losing battle. It is important to remember that this is not true. Millions of women have experienced what you are going through, and I am one of them. Getting mental health support from someone who knows what being on this journey feels like can go a long way towards feeling less alone. Having our experiences validated is relieving, and talking to someone who trusts your lived experience in your own body helps you trust your own experience more too.
Our bodies are our home. When they become places of pain, or the source of frustration, it can be easy to feel disconnected from ourselves. Internalized ableism can cause us to direct our anger towards ourselves, and become critical of the moments when we are most vulnerable. This can contribute to our bodies feeling like our enemy. In those moments, it’s important to remember that our bodies are also the place where we feel emotions, where we feel connected to our true selves, and enlivened. Part of the human experience is being present to what is happening in our bodies.
In AEDP therapy, we gently bring your relationship with your body into focus, making space to see and move towards healing the grief, anger and frustration you may even be feeling towards yourself. We know that our responses to pain and ongoing chronic health issues have the potential to affect how we experience them. If we see pain as a problem, the tension we feel in response, can actually increase our brains sensitivity to pain. Learning to orient ourselves towards our body in a gentler, kinder way won’t cure any chronic health conditions, but it can make our bodies a slightly safer home for us to live in.
If this sounds like something you are curious about, or if you or a loved one are navigating chronic health challenges and feeling alone, we would love to support you. Several folks on our team specialize in holding space and being with all of the emotions that can surface as part of being on a chronic health journey. Please reach out! We would love to hear your story and have a chat about how we might be able to support you.
